Dating. The thrilling, slightly terrifying journey of meeting new people, navigating awkward conversations, and trying to figure out if you’re both headed toward a long, happy relationship—or if it’s time to bail before someone accidentally eats all your fries. In the world of romance, spotting the right match can sometimes feel like deciphering a confusing treasure map, with a few red flags and green lights along the way. So, how do you know when to push the brakes and when to accelerate? Let’s break it down with a little humour—and a dash of sophistication.

Red Flags: The “Oh-No” Moments

Before we dive into the green lights, let’s talk about those glaring red flags—the things you should absolutely pay attention to before you find yourself saying, “Well, this is… fine!”

1. The “Too Good to Be True” Syndrome

We’ve all been there: a dazzling first date where everything seems perfect, the chemistry is undeniable, and they’ve already planned a second date before you even finish your coffee. And while this might sound dreamy, let’s not get swept up just yet. If they’re moving too fast or showering you with compliments that seem more like a script than sincere admiration, it’s worth slowing down and asking yourself: Is this genuine, or am I in a rom-com montage? Real relationships develop at a steady pace, not at warp speed.

2. The “Talks About Exes Like They’re Still on Speed Dial” Syndrome

Look, we all have a past. But if every conversation with your date feels like a therapy session dedicated to their ex, it’s a major red flag. If they’re still emotionally invested in someone who’s not you, you may want to put a pin in this one. A little healthy closure goes a long way, but excessive ex-talk? Not so much. If you’re hearing more about the ex than about you, it might be time to raise an eyebrow—or even raise a glass… to moving on.

3. The “Gaslighting” Disaster

And then there’s this: the date that leaves you feeling off. Maybe they act one way but tell you something completely different. Maybe they make you question your own reality with casual comments like, “I never said that,” or “You’re just being dramatic.” Gaslighting is a huge no-no. In a healthy relationship, both partners should feel heard, understood, and respected—if that’s not happening, it’s time to grab your coat and exit the stage.

Green Lights: The “Yes, Please!” Moments

Okay, now let’s talk about those green lights—the little signals that tell you you’ve found someone with real potential. These are the signs that indicate compatibility, mutual respect, and all those things that make us think, “This could be the start of something beautiful.”

1. The “Real Conversations” Spark

Nothing feels worse than sitting across from someone who is either glued to their phone or staring at the clock. But when you find someone who’s genuinely interested in getting to know you—who asks thoughtful questions and listens without interrupting—you’re on the right track. Real compatibility is built on real conversations, not just surface-level banter about the weather or your mutual love of overpriced lattes. If you’re sharing thoughts, dreams, and even vulnerabilities (and they’re doing the same), you’re on a solid foundation.

2. The “Respect for Boundaries” Vibe

A green light is someone who respects your personal space and boundaries—whether emotional, physical, or otherwise. In other words, they don’t pressure you to rush things, make you feel uncomfortable, or assume you’ll always be available. When you’re with someone who genuinely respects your pace, you know you’re dealing with maturity and emotional intelligence. Bonus points if they even ask about your boundaries or check in to see how you’re feeling. That’s what we call “relationship gold.”

3. The “Shared Values” Connection

We’re not talking about whether you both like pineapple on pizza (although that’s a nice bonus); we’re talking about the big stuff: your approach to life, love, and your values. Are your goals aligned? Do you both prioritise trust, kindness, and open communication? These are the foundational pieces that lead to long-term compatibility. When you’re both on the same wavelength in terms of your values, the relationship has staying power. That’s a green light for sure.

Bonus Green Light: Laughter

We’d be remiss not to mention this one: Do they make you laugh? Not just a polite chuckle, but genuine, belly-laughing, tears-in-your-eyes kind of laughter? Humor is often the best glue in a relationship, and when you can find someone who shares your sense of humor—or at least laughs at your terrible puns—you’re already winning. Let’s be real, you don’t need a perfect match, just someone who’s willing to laugh at life’s absurdities with you.

Final Thoughts: Trust the Process (and Your Gut)

At the end of the day, dating is like a journey through a labyrinth of red flags, green lights, and everything in between. While we all love a good romance novel plot, real relationships take time, effort, and mutual understanding. It’s important to trust your instincts and pay attention to the signs—whether they’re green lights or red flags.

So, next time you find yourself in a dating scenario, take a moment to evaluate the situation. Are you heading for a happy ending or a plot twist? The key is to be patient, discerning, and open-minded. After all, the best relationships don’t just happen—they evolve, grow, and develop into something that feels like home. And trust us, that’s worth the wait.